Hello. Welcome. I’m Kathy, alias yinyangmother.
I’m someone interested in balance, which means I’m human. Without balance we can’t stand up straight (with apologies to those whose abilities are limited in this area), so that we run the risk of falling flat on our faces. I’ve fallen flat on my face before, after a few too many wines. It really hurt. But more importantly, without balance, we can’t really live our lives fully – at least that’s what I think.
Sure extremes can be great big adrenaline rushes (have you ever pondered how extreme enjoyment and extreme disaster both stimulate adrenaline in similar ways), but you can’t sustain the highs and noone wants to stay down in the doldrums.
The very Zen-like path to contentment is a journey into balance. Happiness is great, when experienced along a continuum of contentment.
Ok, so that’s my philosophy, which of course isn’t mine but is borrowed (and bastardised no doubt) from many different traditions, none of which I’m an expert in, none of which I adhere to in any way perfectly, but all of which have something to offer – IMHO.
My commitment to embracing the yin and yang in my life – which to me means accepting that change is a constant and trying to positively balance the flow of energy through the different facets of my life for the benefit of myself, my family, friends, community, the environment and the world, is a lofty ideal – I’m working on it!
My philosophy is based on trying to understand the principles of the ancient mystical tradition of Taoism as they relate to my life, without claiming to know that much about Taoism (at all) and while trying to surrender to the universal way.
Why examine yin yang in my life? Why this interest in Taoism? And why do I think my quest for understanding and balance could be of any value to anyone else? Very good questions.
You could say I’m having a mid-life crisis, but that would be clichéd. The facts are that I’m a mother of two in her early (OK well
almost mid) forties, who happens to have adopted her two children from China.
I’ve been tolerantly (and happily) married for
18 19 years to my tolerant (for the most part) husband. We suffered infertility. We did the whole IVF thing (which is just an expression to summarise several years of living hell). The pain of those ‘lost’ years has been balanced out by our extreme good fortune in being able to parent our daughter – Miss Yin (11) and son – Little Yang (4). This extreme good fortune turns more extreme and less good during the ‘witching hour’ when often only wine will restore balance in my life!
I didn’t just happen to adopt two children from China. Serendipity and an invisible red thread had something to do with how we came to be parents to our beautiful children, and how they came to be stuck with us. Loss and gain. Yin and Yang. The yin and yang of life, contained, hopefully, within a circle of love.
Before adoption I was interested in China, now I’m fascinated by it. Before adoption I was spiritual, now I’m trying to be authentic in looking to a tradition that originated in the country that gave me my children for guidance.
Professionally, I’m a journalist, or a former journo at least, who worked for over a decade in television reporting and presenting, dabbled in radio and has since done some freelance magazine writing.
I moved into government marketing and communications and later established my own consultancy. I then branched into economic development, with a focus on higher education, and managed business and community engagement for a university. Lately I’ve been back writing again as part of my job, including for a website moregoldcoast.com (you should check it out) and a number of other sites including Tiny Buddha.
In other words, I’ve had a hodgepodge career that has been shaped (or misshapen) by my strong desire to be a parent, and more recently by my horrible realisation that perhaps, after all we went through to be parents, after all the losses of adoption felt by everyone in the adoption triad, even after all that we’ve been blessed with, parenting alone isn’t quite enough to satisfy me!
Clearly I need to cultivate gratitude.
So now I’m attempting to write a blog that will help in my quest to more balanced (and more grateful) and hopefully provide some insight to help someone (anyone) do the same.
I really hope I don’t fail. If I do, at first, then success will come in the natural flow of yin and yang through life. I just want to inject some positive energy into that flow, sort of supercharge it.
So here’s cheers to a supercharged, positive sort of balance – to finding your flow!