Popular – Let it in

Kathy Krugerchange, go with the flow, happiness, love, perspective56 Comments

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At the moment I’m being tortured (or is that too strong a word?) to the tune of ‘Let it go’ from Disney’s hit movie Frozen.

(Ok – I know it’s a common complaint, but here I stand, well write anyway).

My torturer is very cute though (as I’m sure yours is) – in my case our four-year-old son is rather obsessed with watching the video clip (at least several times a day – he’d watch the whole movie over and over if he could).

He throws his arms wide with the appropriate theatrics and belts out his own funny version of the lyrics, while sometimes wearing a dress and all the while insisting he’s a girl! It may just be a stage, whatever.

While my son throw his hands in the air and defiantly sings ‘cold not bogger (that would be bother) me anyway’ – the song does bother me, just a little.

I’m all for female empowerment, throwing off the shackles etc, but why does it have to be so annoying (some of the parodies are quite good though).

There’s so too much societal focus on ‘letting go’ – it has become a universal mantra and a sort of obsession – let go of pain, release the past, let go of every last bit of sh#t until there is NOTHING left.

Nothing –would that be no lessons learned, no wisdom gained, no resilience, no muscle memory of pain, nothing bad left in your life, or if so, head to therapy girl (not saying therapy is never needed, just not until you’ve let every last thing go – you simply don’t have to).

The ‘need’ to let go first, excuses our failure to move forward right now. 

It can keep us in therapy, in limbo, and in pain! Frozen really.

Now as someone who had a sh#tload of ‘stuff’ that I held onto from years of infertility, pregnancy loss and the long adoption process, I understand the need to let go.

And I have, slowly over the years – infertility no longer sears my soul and the scars have healed as, well, scar tissue. I’m OK (with two beautiful adopted kids, what’s not to be OK about, right?).

But I don’t think I’ve let everything go though – and wonder if I ever will (or even should).

What I do know is that if we flip the focus to what we let in – if we concentrate on accepting a whole lot of good stuff, we sweep the sh#t right out of the way.

We actually transform all that negative energy into positive stuff (same energy, just different frequency).  It’s every bit as magical as turning water into ice, or unfreezing it for that matter. Sometimes we don’t even realize it’s happening.

All of a sudden its summer and our snowman hasn’t melted after all! Happy days!

But if we worry (another thing we really should let go of) about letting go of all the ‘bad’ stuff (pain, regret, jealousy, fear, anger etc etc) – if we obsess about the releasing, the giving up – we can actually close ourselves off from the letting in, from receiving.

We can even convince ourselves that we don’t deserve to receive until we let go – and that’s harmful.

Especially when there’s a whole lot to let in:

Love

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Hope

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Faith

 

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Laughter

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Joy

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Adventure

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Change

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Challenge

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Friendship

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Forgiveness

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Understanding

Compassion

Compliments

Abundance

the list goes on, and on.

 

So go on: ‘Let it in….let it in…..

To revise those famous Frozen lyrics – ‘A (bit of) pain never bothered me anyway’.

Linking up with the lovely Jess for IBOT. What are you letting in this winter, or summer, wherever you may be?

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Kathy KrugerPopular – Let it in

56 Comments on “Popular – Let it in”

  1. Sarah Barrett

    It sounds like I sing this song like your son!! Love throwing my hands out in a bit of theatrics.
    I agree too, that society is too focused upon letting things go. This is all well and good, BUT first you need to focus upon it, work through it, learn from it THEN let it go.

    1. Kathy Kruger

      It is one of those songs for theatrics! You are right, we need to work through things and open ourselves up to new possibilities in the meantime until we understand the value of the lesson.

  2. Elisa {With Grace & Eve}

    Oh you are wise. I needed to read this. Thank you. I think it’s about trusting in time too, that we will let go of the thing we need to let go of at the time that’s right for us – can’t force it. Here’s to letting in more joy! And yep that film clip is on repeat here too, using up all the data allowance on my phone! X

    1. Kathy Kruger

      Thanks so much and glad the words resonated. Time is the magic ingredient isn’t it – but we get impatient or feel pressured. Now that we have the DVD the phone data allowance is getting a bit of respite.

  3. floodproofmum

    Great post, love this song even though I don’t have little ones here to sing it to me. I have been known to sing “Wanna Build a Snowman” at work though :) I agree with letting in as well as letting go…very thought provoking x

  4. BOYEATSWORLD

    I’ve had to sit through Frozen about 300 times in the last week and about the only thing I want to let go of is that song. I’m not one for “letting go” of the bad stuff just dealing with it and accepting it for being part of my life. The good wouldn’t be half as exciting if there weren’t down times to balance it. I’m with you, let’s stop letting it go and start letting it in. Oh, and lets buy some earmuffs to block out that song!

    1. Kathy Kruger

      Great attitude Aleny – I secretly loooove that song, just not on repeat. You are so right – it is the balance that I bang on about – and the focus on the positive. Sadness illuminates life just as surely as joy – it is how we choose to see it~ X

    1. Kathy Kruger

      Yes, Yes – letting it go can take on negative connotations – like losing weight – flip it to ‘gaining health’ and it looks different – and don’t rush it, LET IT HAPPEN. Glad to be on the same wave length as you Josefa.

  5. coloursofsunset

    What a great post Kathy. I can somewhat relate to not being able to let everything go, and wondering if you ever will. I feel like I have moved on from our fertility struggles, but there is a huge part of me that will never be able to let go and really be ok. But letting IN the LOVE from our gorgeous boy that we are so fortunate to have, certainly helps. And immersing myself in a lot of other things helps also. Thanks for this post. xo Aroha

    1. Kathy Kruger

      Thanks Aroha – I think I just thought of things in my usual balance terms and went – shit happens – we work through it, we move on, but there is too much focus on somehow leaving things behind as though failure and loss never existed. They happened to make us stronger and to appreciate the incredible love we have now – you and I know that. X

  6. Emily @ Have A Laugh On Me

    This movie got H and I through his operation and subsequent hospital stay! I love the letting go thing, wish I had been able to do more of it when I was younger, getting better at it. Em – also visiting as part of #teamIBOT – but I’d be here anyway x

  7. mummywifeme

    I have been waiting all day to read this post and you didn’t disappoint. I love the way you think. I have been trying to do a lot of letting go over the past weeks dealing with some personal issues, but I do hope that I will be ready again sometime very soon to be able to let some good and great stuff back in again. Great stuff, Kathy!!

    1. Kathy Kruger

      Renee – you are too kind. I’m late in responding (as usual) – I hope the issues for you are getting better with a combination of letting go/letting in! X

  8. EssentiallyJess

    I had just got that song out of my head…..
    It’s one of those things that needs balance isn’t it? Letting go of what’s not good, to let in what is so much better. Letting go of fear to have faith, hate to have love, doubt to have hope. That kind of thing.
    I actually have my own issue with that song, but that’s a blog post for another day…. :)

    1. Kathy Kruger

      Hey Jess – apologies for reigniting the ear worm. I really do ‘love’ that song but I just think of the balance of one thing vs another. What you talk about – we don’t just choose love, we let go of hate and in letting go of hate we choose love – this is the message – otherwise it feels like something so hard, when really love, hope and faith are really easy things to choose! Love to read your post on the subject.

  9. Lisa@RandomActsOfZen

    Yes, there certainly is a lot to let in, we just need to be open to it. I love all the messages in this movie, Kathy. And Bell’s school choir sang some of the songs on assembly a few weeks ago. I may have teared up just a little xx

    1. Kathy Kruger

      Oh Lisa I am such a sucker for the Disney songs – and you know I complain about the repeat, repeat, repeat – but there is so much to love – and LET IN!

  10. sheridan90

    Oops… I may or may not sing this in the shower pretty much every day. I love the idea of letting go of what people think of you. That’s how I feel when I sing this song, theatrics and all.
    I agree about the lessons learned. I try not to hold grudges, but I do try to hold onto painful memories for the sole purpose of learning from my mistakes.
    Great post. I hope your little man finds a new movie fad soon for your sanity’s sake!

    1. Kathy Kruger

      I’m (guilty) – I sing it in the shower too – it is in my head so much! I think you have a smart approach to what you let go of and what you keep. I guess I’m coming from a perspective that we sometimes dwell on doing the really hard work of letting things go, rather than the ‘easier’ option of feeling we deserve to let in good things (I say this thinking of ‘guilt’ mainly).

    1. Kathy Kruger

      Thanks Becky – it’s all about balance isn’ it? Don’t focus so much on ‘dealing’ with all the bad stuff and letting it go, and focus instead on welcoming the good stuff.

  11. Tegan Churchill

    I’ve spoken a few times before about the therapy that I’m doing at the moment and what I love about it is that it’s not about letting it go. It’s more about accepting that, that is the way things are at the moment, so how can I change my perspective of it. I love your outlook of letting in things, because if we don’t make room for extra negativity..well misery loves company so hopefully it will get lonely and bugger off!

  12. Grace

    Beautifully written, Kathy. I love your list. I agree with Tegan. Rather than “letting it go” it’s about acceptance. Sometimes it’s just about riding that wave, seeing where it takes you x

  13. prettymom

    I’m probably the only parent who doesn’t complain about this song. I love it! Ok, I didn’t really like it initially and couldn’t stand the kid at the next table keep playing the song from her parents’ ipad / ipod at the restaurant. So tempted to tell them to either turn the volume down or I’ll smash your device! Until I watched the movie. Nowadays I listen to it when I’m frustrated because I need to “Let it go!” It’s therapeutic. LOL!

  14. NewLifeOnTheRoad (@NewLifeOnRoad)

    I so need to take on that motto and let it in…I so need to let go. Actually I haven’t seen the Movie “Frozen” – my boys have…maybe I need to sit down and take the time to watch it with them! And to let more love in, let pain go and let the past be the past. Great ideas you have Kathy xx

  15. Danielle L

    I love your take on ‘letting go’, I agree it can be used as a crutch to excuse not moving forward. This summer I will aim to let in more adventure to lead to more fun. (BTW,my son feels your pain, the girls at kinder play the song on high rotation and he now can’t stand it!)

  16. Bec @ The Plumbette

    Kathy this post is fantastic! I guess the things I want to let go are the small things that really do need to be let go of, but big life changes and disappointments are hard to let go and there are lessons from them that need to be learned. My girls love the Let it go song and they also do the actions. It’s cute to watch them actually. :)

    1. Kathy Kruger

      They are so cute aren’t they. Miss Yin did a ballet concert piece from Frozen – the older girls – she’s 11 – did one part and they had the lower ballet grades doing other parts – the 3-4 year old’s singing and ‘dancing’ to Let it Go were so adorable.

  17. Emily

    Confession time – I’ve never heard the song! We missed the Frozen craze. But I’m pretty sure there’s a Frozen DVD wrapped under the tree at my MIL’s house for my daughter, so I’m sure I’ll be singing the song in its entirety by New Year’s Eve! Merry Christmas Kathy x

  18. Jude Mosley

    I have just come out of the back end of two boys (24 & 20 – one biological, one adopted) & four girls ( 25, 23 & two 18 year olds…one biological and three adopted). How they all didn’t kill me either in singles, pairs or multiples I have no idea. My lovelies you all have a long way ahead of you …. the only thing I can tell you, is this – I never liked them all equally, but I DID dislike them all equally :)

  19. Caitlin

    Great post! So many lessons to be learned in one kids movie! I think there are some really great messages about parenting within Frozen also. Pain can be so strengthening. I’m prepared to let it in!

    1. Kathy Kruger

      Thanks Sarah. Funny this is a fairly popular post and we revisited Frozen on the weekend – it was a bit nostalgic as my son is almost outgrowing it (or at least dressing up like Elsa). So many lessons in kid’s movies if we stop to listen and think.Thanks for visiting.

  20. Vanessa

    “Just let go of it” to me feels a bit like “don’t expect anything of anyone and you won’t get let down”. So, does that mean I just shouldn’t have standards? Some of these sayings are nice but kind of fall apart when you analyse them the slightest bit :)

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