Nothing – it’s what you really need

Kathy Krugerbalance, contentment31 Comments

I’m on holidays as I publish this (oh I’m sorry to make you jealous) – enjoying that sense of space we find so hard to find in our everyday lives. What do we look forward to when we go on holidays? Mostly doing NOTHING.

I can’t get away from the theme right now that what we need most when it comes to selfcare are opportunities to press pause in our life (see this post 10 #parentingpauses). Forget massages and facials and new shoes (well maybe not forget them, but they are not as important – remember it’s not about being selfish but self-full).

What we need most is not something – but nothing – space, silence, stillness.

I think we feel empty because our consumerist, yang society is always telling us we’re not enough. And when we feel empty we’re conditioned by our consumerist, yang society to want something to fill the void. Another toy, something to eat or drink, some new success, something (and often anything – think drugs, TV, facebook, candy crush saga, even random emergencies) to take our mind off everything (because we have so much to deal with)!

We don’t sit well with empty.

Outside of holidays we feel guilty if we are doing NOTHING and yet we yearn for it.

Brunswick Heads

It’s crazy how we (are taught to) think, isn’t it?

We have too much to deal with, with so we think we just need more time. But time is both finite (when it comes to getting things done – there just ain’t any more) and infinite (when it comes to just being and doing nothing – it’s endless).

We know (well most of us) that aside from the more time we wish for, we need less stuff to fill the time we are lucky to have. But that simple answer isn’t so simple to achieve.

Sometimes I think my words simply add to the clutter that complicates life.

If I’m saying that what we need is so simple – stillness, space, silence – then why do I clog up your screen with more of my written detritus. Perhaps I should just say NOTHING.

So I won’t post another Christmas gift list (I did this one last year that was all about giving and receiving love and connection, presence – not presents).

But I won’t stop writing (because there are plenty of people writing about simple living so maybe my words aren’t a waste of space – think of the famous Leo Babuto from Zen Habits – Michelle from My Slow Living Adventure interviews him on her blog).

Instead I’ll watch my words, choose them wisely, and so offer you the space and time to find nothing.  Maybe go meditate.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

NOTHING is what can fill the emptiness we feel from too much of EVERYTHING.

Linking up from beautiful Brunswick Heads with Essentially Jess  for IBOT – Do you agree that NOTHING is the simple answer?

Namaste sign off_edited-1

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Kathy KrugerNothing – it’s what you really need

31 Comments on “Nothing – it’s what you really need”

  1. Min (@riteofthemiddle)

    Ahhh yes – the gift of doing nothing! It’s a funny thing that. I only ever seem to give myself permission to do ‘nothing’ when I am away on holidays. Yet, it would be so beneficial to my wellbeing to allow myself moments of doing nothing on a more regular basis. I do find that I carry guilt if I’m not achieving or being productive – in my normal non holiday days! I’m very much looking forward to 6 days/5 nights away in December where I can do nothing as much as I want. Enjoy your holiday! 🙂

  2. always josefa (@always_josefa)

    I think it is so important to find our everything in what we already have then sit with the stillness and find peace in the nothing. A question I have been asking myself lately – “is this enough?” and often the answer – despite the circumstance of the question is always yes. We have enough, we are enough, in that we are equally everything and nothing. Enjoy the break – my body aches for our end of year break xx

    1. Kathy Kruger

      I like that Josefa – I guess we can’t sit around and do NOTHING (and wouldn’t want to) but if we tell ourselves the answer is always that we are doing enough, then that is great. I’m sure the end of year break will feel like heaven.

  3. KezUnprepared

    Oh yes. I appreciate every bit of nothing I receive these days (those moments can be few and far between). I feel like society thinks that makes me lazy or lacking something, but I know it’s good for the soul 🙂

  4. mummywifeme

    Oh we most definitely need your words. You always seem to write what I need to hear. I might have to employ you as my psychologist 😉 You always get me thinking in a direction I hadn’t thought of. I like it. I hope you’re having an amazing time with the fam x

    1. Kathy Kruger

      You’re funny Renee – but glad I get you thinking. It was lovely – I do have a problem with turning my thoughts of though, regardless – I think (ha,ha) it’s end of year ruminating.

    1. Kathy Kruger

      Thanks Janet – not long to go to your chilling now (I’m going to sneak a few days off to stretch out the break with the public holidays – not going way again, but I’ll be chillin too).

  5. Tegan Churchill

    Ah good old relaxing nothing. I think that the martyr syndrome and feeling like if we aren’t busing, then we aren’t doing enough contributes to our feelings of worthlessness.

    I hope you are enjoying your holidays!

  6. Lizzing Lightly

    It is so true – why do we feel that we need to busy all of the time? Sometime I think it is to feel important. Slowing down and taking time for nothing is a real skill to be practiced. Thanks for reminding me to try and fit it in!

    1. Kathy Kruger

      Nice of you to visit – and I agree that we get a sense of identity out of being busy. Not that I want to be known as the lazy one, but I know I need to slow down or at least find the nothing times within the busyness.

  7. Pinky Poinker

    I’ve been so busy lately I actually enjoy the twenty-five minute drive to work because all I have to do is think (and drive of course but that’s on auto pilot). I can’t wait until my holidays for a bit of navel gazing. Enjoy yours Kathy 🙂

  8. This Charming Mum

    I hope you’re having a wonderful holiday! I am not a materialistic person – shoes don’t make me happy – but I AM very bad at doing nothing. I definitely fill up all the spaces in my day. Some of it, of course, has to be done – we need to eat, earn, live in something vaguely equating to a hygienic bathroom! But a lot of it could also wait till tomorrow and the world wouldn’t end. Thank you for the timely reminder.

  9. Pingback: The lazy guide to being enough in 2015 | Yinyangmother

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